I believe...

I believe - That just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I believe - That we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I believe - That no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I believe - That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.

I believe - That you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I believe - That it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I believe - That you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I believe - That you can keep going long after you think you can't.

I believe - That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.

I believe - That either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I believe - That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I believe - That money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I believe - That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I believe - That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up.

I believe - That sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I believe - That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.

I believe - That it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I believe - That no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I believe - That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I believe - That you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

I believe - Two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I believe - That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.

I believe - That even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I believe - That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I believe - That the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have.

a new beginning

i know most of you heard my testimony in church the day i was released and you know that i really loved serving the families in our ward as the rs president. louann, elaine, and patty all gave me tons of love and support and anything that was accomplished was because of them. they were simply the best. i had the greatest sisters serving in the organization and i appreciate the effort that is made as all the sisters in rs work together to lift and support each other. you definately see things in a different perspective when you serve in a leadership position. i hope that someday...far far away (lol) that i'll have another chance to serve as a leader again (doesn't have to be the president, though, lol)

i am very excited about my new calling as a sunday school teacher for the 14-15 year olds in our ward. this past sunday was our first class and it couldn't have been better. i will be losing a few of the kids at the first of the year and that saddens me cause i'd hold on to them all if i could but there will be some new ones coming in too. i love to be with our youth and am grateful for the opportunity the Lord has given me to learn along with them. this is going to be a wonderful experience...i know it.

the sweetest thing i've ever heard...

i know i sent this to many of you via email but i really wanted to post it on my blog too. if you haven't heard it, copy and paste the link below to your browser.

http://youtube.com:80/watch?v=zCdZwitrNoY

my near death experience...well, one of 'em.

ever had one of those? this one cracks me up whenever i think of it. let me give you a little background first. i've had a love affair with food since i was very young. round has been my prevailing shape most of my life. and comfort foods, love love love them. stuff like mashed potatoes, baked potatoes, sweet potatoes, any kind of potatoes. let's hear it for mac and cheese and don't even get me started on desserts. i haven't met one i didn't like.

well, to get on with the story, way back in grade school, probably about 5th or 6th grade, i was having a hankering for some peanut butter. yummy chunky peanut butter. i didn't seem to want to bother with spreading it on a piece of bread. i grabbed a tablespoon (yea, tha big one) out of the silverware drawer and preceded to scoop out a heaping spoonful from the jar. (this next part makes me think of the blueberry girl on willie wonka) i opened my mouth wide and scraped the whole heaping teaspoon of peanut butter into my mouth. i began to swirl it around with my tongue enjoying the texture, the saltiness, the peanutiness, enjoying every nuance of my peanut butter experience and then i tried to swallow. suddenly i realized that i could not swallow and i could not breath. within a millisecond panic began to set in. i couldn't make a sound, at least not with my mouth and i began to think, oh my gosh, i'm going to die! i'm going to die choking on peanut butter!!! how embarrassing. i felt the effects of oxygen deprivation and i knew if i didn't do something soon, i was going to pass out and the end would soon follow. suddenly, and i know this was inspired, i thought jelly! you need some jelly! grab the jar of jelly!!! so i flung open the door to the fridge, grabbed the jelly jar and scooped out a tablespoon of jelly to rival that of the peanut butter lodged in my throat. i scraped it off into my mouth and began to swirl it quite excitedly with my tongue and continued to try and force it down my throat (kinda like liquid plumber behind a clog in the drain). to my great relief, within about five seconds, that clump of peanut butter slid on down to my stomach thanks to the help of the jelly. i remember thinking, "i'm gonna live! i'm gonna live! thank you Lord!"

that's just another one of those experiences that build my testimony that the Lord loves me and watches over me and that the Holy Ghost is real cause that was pure inspiration there.

italian meatball vegetable soup

by request: very easy and yummy on a cold day...

1 c. small or medium pasta shells
4 c. chicken broth
1 14 oz. can of diced tomatoes
1 10 1/2 oz. can of condensed french onion soup
12 frozen fully cooked Italian meatballs thawed and quartered
1 c. fresh chopped spinach
1 c. frozen sliced carrots
1 c. canned kidney beans
1 c. canned garbanzo beans (or chickpeas)

Cook pasta per package directions (i don't cook mine quite all the way). Combine all the remaining ingredients and bring to a boil. Reduce heat, cover and simmer until the carrots are tender. Drain pasta and add to the soup. Makes approximately 8 servings.

familiar spirits and friends

sure, there are people around us that have become familiar by developing relationships over time. but what about those special people that you meet that you feel you've known for a long time? there's an easiness that exists and an acceptance. there's an automatic comfort level there that others have to earn. i think that's just the coolest thing. i've met these people all through my life and i'm excited to finally find out someday who they were to me before, what were our associations if any?

i have been blessed tremendously by the people that have come into my life, and there's been so many. i am fascinated by people, all different kinds. i've always liked to people watch. i love to hear their stories. i love to listen to other perspectives even if i don't agree with them. i love to learn about other peoples quirks and pet peeves (and NO, not so i can get on their nerves, lol). i love to hear what others love, what gets them excited, what makes them happy, what comforts them, what plans they have for their future. and what i find amazing is that with all our differences, we always have so much more in common.

i love to read your blogs. this is very cool.

in spite of it all...

ya know, i feel i need to explain a little further about this nerve thing. it's not a constant thing, it's an on again/off again thing. it is not everybody that is encroaching on my nerves. unfortunately it is either too often the peeps closest to me that know my buttons and really don't mean to push them (you know that familiarity breeds contempt thing) and hopefully because of the closeness of our hearts we will continue to be forgiving as we work together to see me through the other side of this, or it's the complete and total stranger that is totally oblivious to the fact that whatever it is they are doing is totally ticking me off. road rage, though much less severe than in my pre-church life, has resurfaced. but i'm not always in the cage and my nerves are not always raw.

i am going through a stretching, learning, reflecting, and discovering phase in my life as well. looks like that might be the norm from here on out. nothing ever stays the same. i am so glad life is like this though. i hate boredom more than anything. and rest assured i will always look for the silver lining and the rainbows after the rain. my family and our love for one another, my cherished friends, and my membership and opportunities to serve in the church help to keep me humble and grounded. life is good, nerves and all!

my last nerve

where did that phrase come from? you're getting on my last nerve. why do we wait until there's only one left? why don't we speak up and defend the first nerve? does that one not matter? i would think it would be equally important as some nerve damage is permanent. given the potential for those around me to get on my nerves, intentionally or not, by the time you reach my age, you can accumulate a substantial inventory of compressed nerve endings.

this nerve thing has been on my mind as i reflect on my periodic bouts of hormonally induced nerve sensitivity as a result of my passage through menopause. i used to think i was nuts. but that was different. i was in control of my insanity. this is a whole different animal. i cannot believe the gamut of emotional fluctuations from anger to manic jubilation, to depression, to who knows what. nothing resembles normal anymore. sometimes i feel like an animal in a cage, a lioness, and it seems that most everyone is poking at me and prodding me through the cage. others are tapping and pounding on the glass and every single nerve ending is on red alert. i would bite and claw but my cage keeps those around me relatively safe aside from my ferociously resonant roar.

i tell myself to relax, be patient, it's no ones fault, when i have those moments of sanity (sometimes only lasting for seconds and few and far betwixt as they may be). and i can only imagine how many nerves i've stepped on throughout my life. and now i'm thinking maybe it won't be too bad when i get down to the last of the last of my nerves. maybe someday, as pink floyd so melodically put it, i [will] have become comfortably numb. sounds real good right now.

ps. i cannot express emphatically enough my appreciation for those closest to me that know what a pain in the butt i am right now and still love and support me anyway. thanks a million to those that help me find my mind as frequently as i lose it, and thanks to all those who have forgiven me for my neurological trespasses.

HT lesson

in the month of sept., our ht john kingrey came to visit our family. our other ht, chris rampton, had surgery on his hand and wasn't able to come over, understandably so. but john shared with us a very interesting thought during that visit that i want to pass on. it was about the introduction to the Book of Mormon when it spoke about joseph being visited by the angel throughout the night and how because of the constant interruptions to his sleep not to mention the messages he was receiving that would change all life as he knew it he was not able to perform his usual chores the next day.when he went out to work with his dad he was absolutely exhausted. his dad told him to go home and as joseph was trying to cross a fence, he fell down, completely and totally spent. then the angel came back and appeared to him, and did he say, "aw joseph, you look so tired. i'm sorry to have kept you up all night." heck no. he said, and i'll paraphrase here, get up. you need to climb that hill, you know the biggest one in the county? yea, and when you get up there you need to find the stone where the plates are hidden up. now, joseph somehow mustered up the strength to do what was asked of him. he didn't say you gotta be kiddin me, as i would have. i don't doubt that he was blessed with strength that was not his own, but it still made me think wow! what faith. what an amazing experience. what an amazing boy.